Despite the incredible array of new shows that began last week, despite having watched Community three times in 36 hours, despite The Office's magnificent return, despite spending the weekend with a friend who appeared in the credits of Parks and Recreation (which is by far the coolest thing any of my friends have ever done, sorry to everyone else), despite Survivor already having me hooked after only one episode, despite the fact that the Emmys were this weekend...there is still something much more urgent to discuss.
DREW CAREY IS THE WORST GAME SHOW HOST EVER.
Yes, Drew Carey has officially surpassed Howie Mandel and Alex Trebek. I realize that it is difficult to replace such a legend as Bob Barker, but come on, people. Let's be honest, The Price is Right is not a very exhilarating game -- even more of the magic was lost when I saw it in person and the room was smaller than my high school auditorium. Like on most game shows, the host is the only one who can create true excitement. It should not be the contestants' responsibility. Bob Barker could make anything suspenseful and interesting. Even the people winning the cars aren't excited when it's announced by Drew Carey. I literally hate it so much that I refuse to even try to find a clip to link to. It's better this way, trust me.
Case in point: John O'Hurley (who apparently was Drew Carey's competition for The Price is Right and for some inexplicable reason did not get it). He hosts another extremely cheesy and washed out game show (Family Feud), but he makes it exciting: the hand holding, the quick wit, the relatability, it's all there. Oh, and additionally, unlike Drew Carey, John O'Hurley does not have a new pedophile haircut. As if grooming himself to look like Michael Moore will make him less annoying.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
Episode 305
A new show on the CW, Vampire Diaries, recently caught my attention when I heard it described as "Dawson's Creek meets Twilight". Well, what could be better? Unless Paul Rudd were involved, I don't think this idea could be improved upon at all.
And then I watched the trailer.
So it turns out that by "Dawson's Creek meets Twilight" they meant "Twilight aired on the network that happened to also air Dawson's Creek." This trailer could have been played out with Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson, and I literally wouldn't have batted an eye, except to wonder why Twilight was now a TV series.
Thanks CW, but I think I'll stick with Gossip Girl. That's more like Dawson's Creek meets crack cocaine.
And then I watched the trailer.
So it turns out that by "Dawson's Creek meets Twilight" they meant "Twilight aired on the network that happened to also air Dawson's Creek." This trailer could have been played out with Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson, and I literally wouldn't have batted an eye, except to wonder why Twilight was now a TV series.
Thanks CW, but I think I'll stick with Gossip Girl. That's more like Dawson's Creek meets crack cocaine.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Episode 304
Gossip Girl is such a beautiful show that I could literally watch it on mute and would probably enjoy it almost as much -- just for the aesthetics. I say "almost" because the drama -- and their beautiful voices -- are just too good. But honestly, the characters' Upper East Side outfits, Blair's lips, Serena's hair, Chuck's eyes, their impeccably decorated houses, the stunning jewelry, even just the bricks in the courtyard of the school: I just want to be immersed in a world that is so beautiful. This is how some people may feel about poetry; it's how I feel about Gossip Girl.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Episode 303
How I Met Your Mother is the exception to the rule. Actually it is the exception to several rules:
RULES:
1) Sitcoms about groups of twenty- or thirtysomethings friends will never live up to the original.
2) Any TV show made post-90s starring Bob Saget must suck.
3) Jason Segel is always the funniest person in a room.
The key to this super-smart comedy is, of course, Neil Patrick Harris. Come to think of it, there's another rule/exception:
4) Child actors from late 80s TV shows cannot under any circumstances become successful and actually talented actors.
Every brilliant comedy seems to have one character who is, well, abnormal. Think about it: Dwight, Tracy Jordan, Buster, Screech, the list goes on. But what Neil Patrick Harris (along with the writers) does is create that abnormality without portraying a character who is clearly missing a few brain cells. Thus, I love Barney, and for some unknown reason, so do hundreds of other women.
RULES:
1) Sitcoms about groups of twenty- or thirtysomethings friends will never live up to the original.
2) Any TV show made post-90s starring Bob Saget must suck.
3) Jason Segel is always the funniest person in a room.
The key to this super-smart comedy is, of course, Neil Patrick Harris. Come to think of it, there's another rule/exception:
4) Child actors from late 80s TV shows cannot under any circumstances become successful and actually talented actors.
Every brilliant comedy seems to have one character who is, well, abnormal. Think about it: Dwight, Tracy Jordan, Buster, Screech, the list goes on. But what Neil Patrick Harris (along with the writers) does is create that abnormality without portraying a character who is clearly missing a few brain cells. Thus, I love Barney, and for some unknown reason, so do hundreds of other women.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Episode 302
Television can be stressful. Take September 17 please, for example (by the way, if you're not picking up my references to The Office, it's time to start re-watching old episodes). Oh, by the way, OH MY GOD.
On September 17, the following television shows need to be watched primetime: Survivor, Parks and Recreation, The Office, Community -- are we feeling stressed yet? --The Jay Leno Show, Project Runway. Not bad for a 2.5 hour time slot. But that's just September 17. We can't forget about shows that start later, or happen to not be on Thursday nights: 30 Rock, Top Chef, Glee, So You Think You Can Dance, The Next Iron Chef, How I Met Your Mother, 90210.
I may -- may -- just be counting my lucky stars that LOST doesn't start again until 2010.
P.S. I know that I'm not dedicated enough since I don't watch True Blood, Mad Men, blah blah blah, but there are only so many brain cells a girl can lose. I need to save some for the rest of the Twilight series.
On September 17, the following television shows need to be watched primetime: Survivor, Parks and Recreation, The Office, Community -- are we feeling stressed yet? --The Jay Leno Show, Project Runway. Not bad for a 2.5 hour time slot. But that's just September 17. We can't forget about shows that start later, or happen to not be on Thursday nights: 30 Rock, Top Chef, Glee, So You Think You Can Dance, The Next Iron Chef, How I Met Your Mother, 90210.
I may -- may -- just be counting my lucky stars that LOST doesn't start again until 2010.
P.S. I know that I'm not dedicated enough since I don't watch True Blood, Mad Men, blah blah blah, but there are only so many brain cells a girl can lose. I need to save some for the rest of the Twilight series.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Episode 301
After three weeks without television (yes, it's true - but reading Confessions of a Shopaholic and Twilight is such a brainless activity that it qualifies as TV, right?), I feel like it wouldn't be fair to try to jump right back in with a post on a show that I haven't been consistently watching. So, I will start with commercials. As most of you probably know, I absolutely love the Sonic commercials, which I was only introduced to upon my relocation to the alien world of California. The first one I ever saw still has me cracking up every time I think about it -- it just drives me...you'll see: just watch.
I just recently saw another version, equally as brilliant. This one, though maybe not as laugh-out-loud funny, really hit home and made me realize that people writing for TV are just normal (read: abnormal) people like you and me, who used weird mnemonic devices to help them remember their locker combinations. Yet somehow these genius writers are still at it with the Sonic commercials, while some really untalented people have made it to prime time with My Boys (for example).
This newest Sonic commercial may be most appealing to the Saved by the Bell generation, when lockers were for cool kids (locks, though, not so much, but we can ignore that for right now). And since I brought up Saved by the Bell (on purpose), I would just like to take this opportunity to announce that you are reading a blog about TV by someone whose commentaries on TV have recently been published in one of the most widely read publications in the U.S.: People Magazine (yes, in the MailBag section, but still, can you imagine how many people send in letters each week?!) So even though only about 10 people will read this entry, 3.75 million people will know how I feel about Saved by the Bell.
I just recently saw another version, equally as brilliant. This one, though maybe not as laugh-out-loud funny, really hit home and made me realize that people writing for TV are just normal (read: abnormal) people like you and me, who used weird mnemonic devices to help them remember their locker combinations. Yet somehow these genius writers are still at it with the Sonic commercials, while some really untalented people have made it to prime time with My Boys (for example).
This newest Sonic commercial may be most appealing to the Saved by the Bell generation, when lockers were for cool kids (locks, though, not so much, but we can ignore that for right now). And since I brought up Saved by the Bell (on purpose), I would just like to take this opportunity to announce that you are reading a blog about TV by someone whose commentaries on TV have recently been published in one of the most widely read publications in the U.S.: People Magazine (yes, in the MailBag section, but still, can you imagine how many people send in letters each week?!) So even though only about 10 people will read this entry, 3.75 million people will know how I feel about Saved by the Bell.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Episode 2.501
After yet another long break, I begin Season 2.5, which will be precisely one episode long (unless of course something drastic happens on The Bachelorette finale). I feel like LOST, with really short seasons and really long breaks. Now that I think about it, that would be a good excuse not to write again until 2010. In any case, I will make this entry a bit longer to make up for it. And of course, I will return for Season 3 in the fall -- I imagine that NBC's spectacular fall line-up will give me plenty of material.
I learned on my hiatus that you can now watch television on the plane. I knew that you could watch pre-prepared TV on those little screens that the cooler airlines have, but I had no idea that you could actually watch satellite TV. I often bemoan flying primetime because I know I'll be missing my shows, but apparently that's no longer a problem. So, for those of you who thought that I might -- dare I say it -- read on the plane, you were wrong.
Instead, I watched reality TV. And for you haters of reality television, I finally found something that will change your mind. I am not talking about Fox's "More to Love" where they are showing that even fuller-figured people have the right to find love on national television (but not ugly people, apparently). Instead, the revolutionary moment came with this week's episode of Top Chef Masters, which was downright feel-good reality television. That might sounds like an oxymoron, but hear me out.
Not only were tears of joy shed (as opposed to tears of embarassment, heartbreak, and pure anger that are common to most reality TV), but the contestants looked out for and supported each other -- instead of sabotage (sandwich?), when it came time to choose the other chefs' ingredients, the contestants picked out only the finest. And they did it with heart. To top it all off the judges were...wait for it...really nice. For anyone who has ever watched even 5 seconds of Chopped, we know that condescending and crazy-ass psycho judges are common, especially in food-related reality shows.
Granted, a show where people are playing for charity -- as opposed to doing it out of greed, mental illness, and/or desire for fame -- allows for the possibility of this outpouring of happy reality. But the previous five episodes of the show were nothing like this week's: even people playing for charity usually still have the cross-me-and-I'll-kill-you drive to win.
Try watching this episode immediately after watching Paris Hilton's My New BFF and the normalcy of it all becomes even more overwhelming. No really, all you reality TV haters, try it. I dare you.
I learned on my hiatus that you can now watch television on the plane. I knew that you could watch pre-prepared TV on those little screens that the cooler airlines have, but I had no idea that you could actually watch satellite TV. I often bemoan flying primetime because I know I'll be missing my shows, but apparently that's no longer a problem. So, for those of you who thought that I might -- dare I say it -- read on the plane, you were wrong.
Instead, I watched reality TV. And for you haters of reality television, I finally found something that will change your mind. I am not talking about Fox's "More to Love" where they are showing that even fuller-figured people have the right to find love on national television (but not ugly people, apparently). Instead, the revolutionary moment came with this week's episode of Top Chef Masters, which was downright feel-good reality television. That might sounds like an oxymoron, but hear me out.
Not only were tears of joy shed (as opposed to tears of embarassment, heartbreak, and pure anger that are common to most reality TV), but the contestants looked out for and supported each other -- instead of sabotage (sandwich?), when it came time to choose the other chefs' ingredients, the contestants picked out only the finest. And they did it with heart. To top it all off the judges were...wait for it...really nice. For anyone who has ever watched even 5 seconds of Chopped, we know that condescending and crazy-ass psycho judges are common, especially in food-related reality shows.
Granted, a show where people are playing for charity -- as opposed to doing it out of greed, mental illness, and/or desire for fame -- allows for the possibility of this outpouring of happy reality. But the previous five episodes of the show were nothing like this week's: even people playing for charity usually still have the cross-me-and-I'll-kill-you drive to win.
Try watching this episode immediately after watching Paris Hilton's My New BFF and the normalcy of it all becomes even more overwhelming. No really, all you reality TV haters, try it. I dare you.
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