I have resisted the temptation to write about The Bachelorette for precisely five weeks. Self-editing is a virtue: a lesson Ashley, this season's per-fect (does anyone else notice that she pronounces that word too phonetically? - yes, I'm a very tolerant person) Bachelorette, needs to learn. For those of you who have avoided ABC, People Magazine, and humanity for the past month or so: this season, Ashley fell immediately for Bentley, a seriously deranged lunatic who trashed her on national television and then left the show, claiming that he couldn't be away from his daughter. Yes, this man is a father.
When he left, Bentley said that their love story wasn't over - instead, there was just a "dot-dot-dot." (Deep, I know.) Boy oh boy, did Ashley hang on to that one.
It would be exhausting and violence-inducing to count the number of times the name Bentley has been spoken this season on the show - I would estimate around two hundred (and we're only six episodes in). What I can count, though, is how many times the word - oh wait, not word, totally ridiculous and meaningless phrase - "dot-dot-dot" was spoken on last night's episode: seven times. That's twenty-one "dot"s in 79 minutes of television. (Full disclosure: I fast-forwarded through all of the "coming up on The Bachelorette" clips, which constitute about 85% of the show, so my count doesn't even include those occurrences - I'd say we could safely double it.)
When he left, Bentley said that their love story wasn't over - instead, there was just a "dot-dot-dot." (Deep, I know.) Boy oh boy, did Ashley hang on to that one.
It would be exhausting and violence-inducing to count the number of times the name Bentley has been spoken this season on the show - I would estimate around two hundred (and we're only six episodes in). What I can count, though, is how many times the word - oh wait, not word, totally ridiculous and meaningless phrase - "dot-dot-dot" was spoken on last night's episode: seven times. That's twenty-one "dot"s in 79 minutes of television. (Full disclosure: I fast-forwarded through all of the "coming up on The Bachelorette" clips, which constitute about 85% of the show, so my count doesn't even include those occurrences - I'd say we could safely double it.)
Luckily, Ashley finally came to her senses and ended the madness using a well-deserved Cee Lo style farewell with three dots of its own: "f*** you."